“People inspire you, or they drain you – pick them wisely.
Is it time to do some spring cleaning of your friends or colleagues & the stuff you don't really need? There are probably some toxic persons & things which are undermining your confidence, betraying your trust, and spreading negativity. There is no escaping the fact that we cannot live in total isolation, as we are social animals. We need to find empathy, compassion and positive stimuli to survive in the jungle. To avoid shutting off from everyone completely, here are 6 toxic things you should say 'No More You' to or, at the very least, avoid as much as possible.
1. Say 'No More You' to those who soak up your time like a sponge.
These may be family members or friends who seize your time like bank robbers! Yes, you have heard it all before. They repeat the same old refrain and there is nothing for you to gain. Friendships need a give and take.
As soon as you ascertain that they do not even want help or can’t offer you affectionate support in return, it may be time to drastically reduce your exposure to these people or just get rid of them. They will waste too much of your time, if you let them.
It may be impossible to get rid of family members, though. So try a few tactics like switching off your phone at certain times of the day or simply invent urgent messages or callers. We all need alone time.
Say "No More You" to the things & people that don’t make you better and that waste your time.
“I think it’s very healthy to spend time alone. You need to know how to be alone and not defined by another person.” – Oscar Wilde
2. Say 'No More You' to those who criticize you far too often.
Nothing wrong with a bit of honest and fair feedback. But when you find that certain people are engaging in constant criticism, it may be time to take action. When the criticism is not constructive in any way, you might even drop them a hint that they are going to lose any friends they have left.
You can also always tell them that their constant criticism is not helpful at all in any way and it upsets you.
“Often those that criticize others reveal what he himself lacks.”
― Shannon L. Alder
3. Say 'No More You' to things that aren’t healthy for your mind & body.
You don’t have time to be sick or feel sluggish. You just don’t. Take your health and well-being very seriously, because right up there with time is your health so you can enjoy your time and your business. You know the saying, garbage in, garbage out? Make sure you’re saying "no" to any garbage you’re putting into your mind and body. "No" to negativity. "No" to fake, bad food. "No" to lethargy. Just say "no" to the thoughts, activities and fuel that isn’t good for you. Fuel yourself with the right no’s to stay healthy.
4. Say 'No More You' to things that aren’t up to you or in your control.
There are things in this life that are inevitably out of your control -- lots of them, actually. So you have a choice. You can fret and freak out about things such as the government, the economy, your partner, the weather or any other variable outside your power, or you can chose to say "no" to the stress that comes from getting upset about things you can’t control.
This isn’t about giving up, it’s about knowing you’re going to get through whatever storms may come. Frankly, giving in to worry or the illusion you can control the outcome only creates stress and wastes time.
Say "no" to the belief that you can always be in complete control. Say "no" to the undue stress that comes from trying to change outcomes that aren’t up to you.
5. Say 'No More You' to those who have a negative mindset.
These people spread negativity like a contagious disease. Try to get vaccinated by avoiding them at all costs. These people get into a negative downward spiral and it is sometimes difficult not to get dragged down there. These are the people who are always anxious, worried, pessimistic, depressed and complain a lot.\
You need to get rid of them because if you want to live longer, a positive outlook will add years to your life. One Yale study has found that having a positive attitude to aging can help you live seven years longer.
6. Say 'No More You' to those who are dishonest and lie to you.
Some friends will swear secrecy when you tell them something confidential. When you find this information is now common knowledge, you may well be furious and decide to end the friendship. But dishonest and untruthful people can also do harm in many other ways. They may lie to you about their debts or if they are having problems at work. They may also be insincere and lie to you about what they think of your behavior when you ask them for feedback.
These people can only damage friendship over time because trust, truthfulness and honesty are the most precious qualities in any friendship. If they do these things, they are not worthy of your friendship.
“Lying is done with words, and also with silence.”
- Adrienne Rich